If I Had Known… That Caring for Others Does Not Mean Forgetting Yourself

Preparing meals, arranging medical appointments, remembering birthdays, listening to everyone’s worries, supporting an aging parent, handling the unexpected…

Caring for others often consists of countless small everyday gestures. Gestures made out of love, by choice, and from a sense of responsibility. Gestures that also bring great happiness.

But little by little, your own needs take second place. You are tired, but someone needs you.

You would love a break, but there is still so much to do. You would like to confide in someone, but you do not want to be a burden.

That lunch with a friend? Postponed. That activity you wanted to try? Cancelled. That personal project? Perhaps later.

“We should never put things off until later, because in life, later comes sooner than we think.”*

And as you keep postponing your own wishes, you may eventually lose sight of what you need—or even what would make you happy. It is not just your time that disappears; little by little, so does the place you give yourself in your own life.

This is not about loving less, giving less, or regretting your choices. It is about recognizing that your needs, wishes, and well-being matter just as much as everyone else’s.

Taking care of yourself is not selfish. Nor is it something to postpone until everyone else is doing well.

What if, for once, you gave yourself as much attention as you give the people you love?

* Quotation from Baptiste Beaulieu’s book Où vont les larmes quand elles sèchent (Where Do Tears Go When They Dry?).